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Tuesday, January 06, 2004

I must voice my discontent at this winter we are having. It’s bloody 30 degrees Celsius outside and no sign of snow. I suppose that’s what you get for living in the Southern Hemisphere. Someone should tell that to the advertising agencies predicting snow on their commercials.

So, a whole fucking year has passed and I’m one more fucking year older. It was about this time last year that Drexil and I were destroying brain cells with our volumes of alcohol consumption. Life was so much simpler then; wake up, drink, sleep, wake up, drink. A lot has changed in a year. I’ve stopped drinking as much, not as bitter as I used to be and I hardly leave the house…. then again this time last year both Drexil and I were single.

So anyway, now that I’m one year older and have turned into a half man I’ve decided to put away bastard things and feel that it’s finally time to put Hooker Bastard to rest. And I know I’ve retired this blog before but this time I’m serious… and if you could see my face you’d know just how serious I am. It’s got that really, really serious look on it mmm what can I compare it to. Like for instance if I were a doctor (which I’m not) and there was this guy who was dying…let’s say from a gun shot wound. Ok, several gun shot wounds; one to the head, one to the stomach, one to his neck, one to his left foot, four to his right foot, ten in his leg, one it his left ear (which kinda makes that two to the head) and one to his right, middle finger. Ok, let’s just say he got shot by a machine gun and I was the doctor treating him and I knew he was gonna die and his family were standing outside and I went to them and told them he was going to die. You need to have a serious face to do that, even though there may be a desire to make jokes but all in all you gotta have a serious look on your face when to tell people that their friend or family member is dying and that’s the kinda look I have on my face right now. Though don’t get confused I’m not dying just putting Hooker Bastard to rest.

Also, far too many people I don’t want reading my blog are reading it…SO FUCK YOU ALL and you know who your are…. fucking wankers. So I’m going into the Blog Relocation Programme (BRP) and will be starting a new life but I will pop by from time to time to say, ‘hi’ and comment on your blogs and stuff…. so it’s no a complete good bye.

Anyway…bye everyone.
Hooker 10:38 AM

Insults Here

Friday, December 05, 2003

So I had to work late last night, which sucked. I had to listen to bad sixties music yesterday, that sucked. I had to come into work early this morning, which sucked. I’m not in a good mood.

So to celebrate my bad mood, I’ve selfishly declared today Pantera Day. And as I write this, the staff of the company I work for are now listening to 'Fucking Hostile' at decibels unfit for human consumption.

I wish you could all see their faces. Mmm perhaps I should follow with 'This Love'. The soft melodic guitars in the beginning are very deceptive and should give everyone the impression the noise has gone. HEHEHEHEHHAHAHAHAH
Hooker 9:45 AM

Insults Here

...You keep this love, thing, child, toy
You keep this love, fist, scar, break
You keep this love...

Aaaah, a Bastard Display of Power
Hooker 9:45 AM

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Wednesday, December 03, 2003

Sometimes I wish I were dead.
Hooker 5:49 PM

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Friday, November 21, 2003

Thought I'd quickly pop in here and say, 'Hi'.
Hooker 4:16 PM

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Thursday, November 06, 2003

Yikes, been slacking a bit with the blogs. I had an awfully Deer infestation this whole week. Had to call in some experts to sort the problem out. Got some nice new wall decorations now.

So the birthday didn’t go so bad. Got some nice presents. SB got me THIS' (and the Count of Monte Cristo and Donnie Darko DVDs. Yummy, clever person. And Drexil got me a GUN (hehe Goodwill Hunting Season….and Magician and a bottle of J&B)

Anyway, not dead yet. Got silly Diary of Dreams concert this weekend. Check ya Monday.
Hooker 5:26 PM

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Tuesday, October 28, 2003

So, on Thursday I turn old. There of many of you who seem to think it’s a great thing to celebrate the day of your birth, but what you are actually doing is celebrating one year closer to your death (mmm, I suppose there is a bright side to life).
Hooker 8:44 AM

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Monday, October 27, 2003

I used to be a fun animal loving kinda guy but as life goes on I’ve realised I don’t like all of them. Like for instance, I don’t like animals that are called Ted or Roger, or animals that pick on other animals, or animals that Hi-Jack one anothers cars, nor do I like piglet animals that eat ones doughnuts in the morning, nor do I like animals that whine for food and are a pain in the butt. Ever seen those awful kids that throw temper tantrums in super markets cause they didn’t get their own way? And they never stop, even after the shopping experience is over. Those are the kind of kids you look at and say to yourself, ‘I never want to have kids,’ or ‘I hate kids.’ Those nasty animals I just talked about, they’re just like those kids; you never want them.

I did play a wonderful hunting game on my brothers PC yesterday (and no it’s not cruel, they just virtual animals. They don’t feel a thing) and I must say it has a great catharsis to it. I got to even the score with a couple of nasty deers.
Hooker 9:37 AM

Insults Here

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

You know how you can always feel flu coming on; well I can feel insanity coming a mile off. And I think this next bout I'm getting is gonna be hard to shrug off. Everyday I wake up, it's infected me a little more and I find myself thinking about La La land a lot. It may be the Deer inside. I walk around work looking at people through warped, manic eyes and as much as I tell myself I shouldn't kill them, the big, dark deer inside tells me to. I fear I may be lost forever and things are gonna fall apart.

I hope I didn't make this sound like a bad thing.
Hooker 1:55 PM

Insults Here

Tuesday, October 14, 2003

People who live in glasshouses shouldn't throw stones. Why? Because people can get hurt. Stones can be pointy and can cause one to bleed. In 1995 there was this guy who lived in a glasshouse who once threw a stone at a woman walking in the road. The stone hit the woman on her head and her brain fell out. She died two days later in hospital of shock. The guy who threw the stone had to flee his native country because the police were after him. Due to his exiled situation the guy was forced to become a postman and stole NASA's space shuttle and went on an intergalactic crime spree.

The man's simple, glasshouse living life was disrupted by one silly throw of a stone. So everyone should be careful next time they throw stones.
Hooker 10:28 AM

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Monday, October 06, 2003

Right, I'm back from holiday and have to say I could do with another one. EBJones' wedding was smashing from what I could remember of it i.e. I have the photos as memories.

Good thing about my holiday though, I didn't turn into a deer once. Yay.

On a more downer note, I still don't have a new job. I was hoping to receive a wonderful, 'when can you start phone call', but alas I didn't. I was also kinda hoping Luke Sullivan would, from out of the blue, give me a call and offer me a job (the bastard hasn't).

Anyway I've got a new game I want to try and market, which hopefully will make me some cash so I can leave my current job, it's called: 'Fenetik Skrabil'. It's a game that people who can't play regular scrabble can play. I'll keep ya all posted.
Hooker 10:24 AM

Insults Here

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